What does it mean?

Hello bloggie! How are you? Do you miss me, eh? Sorry I haven't post sumthin new 'cause currently I'm a bit unhealthy. I got fever, cough and flu :'( yeah get well soon to me and honestly I miss to post sumthin here...so here I am! Even my mom told that I must take a nap but...I don't want to mom, sorry :p fyi I don't go to school for three days (include today) because I'm sick and hell yeah I feel fuckin bored here -____- I've finished read 4 novels in a day, 'cause there's nothing I can do. Ok feel free to call me crazy, or freak? Maybe I really am. Before I was sitting in front of my laptop, my fingers rested on every letter. I wanted to write. I wanted to create just one brilliant story. But I couldn't. I didn't make any sense. My head was filled. But I don't know what or why. Hmm well I just found this on internet, and I was like...JEPPP! when I read this,

I was trying to control my emotion when you ruined my mood again..

"Ketika wanita menangis,
 bukan berarti dia sedang mengeluarkan senjata terampuhnya,

melainkan justru berarti dia sedang mengeluarkan senjata terakhirnya.
Ketika wanita menangis,
 bukan berarti dia tidak berusaha menahannya, melainkan karena pertahanannya sudah tak mampu lagi membendung air matanya.
Ketika wanita menangis,
 bukan karena dia ingin terlihat lemah,
melainkan karena dia sudah tidak sanggup berpura-pura kuat

Ketika wanita menangis, 
bukan berarti dia ingin mencari perhatian,
melainkan karna apa yang dia perhatikan telah mengabaikannya.
Ketika wanita menangis, 
bukan berarti dia mengharapkan belas kasihan,
melainkan karna dia sedang mengasihani dirinya sendiri.
Ketika wanita menangis, 

bukan berarti dia ingin membuat sesuatu yang dia tangisi merasa bersalah, melainkan karna dia tidak tau kesalahan apa yang membuat keadaan menjadi sedemikian.
Ketika wanita menangis, 

bukan berarti dia sedang memancing kepedulian semua orang terhadapnya, melainkan justru karna dia tau, bahwa tidak akan ada orang yang peduli."

 

and yeah again..that fact...was fuckin true. For me, or let I say for some girl. It totally doesn't mean that girl is weak but it means girl is fragile and tough (too complicated? try to find it by yourself) I love to cry because I'm a girl, I love to cry because I'll be free after that, I love to cry because it reminds me of you, I love to cry because...I want it. I know that I'm not a little baby anymore and I know I'm NOT. I'm strong enough to face it by myself. Sometimes I wonder why things are getting harder everyday, how I wish I could turn back time. It hurts to grow. Anyone who says it doesn't.....is lying. And dear time, can you slow yourself a lil bit every weekends? And much more faster on the weekdays? Thanks.